So, I'm going to dig in here. The idea that "breaking in" or "deflowering" a woman was about male power and prowess, same deal. Ideally, it should start by being something you or any other woman, as well as her partner very much want and feel ready for and comfortable with as a whole. Because this tissue wears away over time, the younger a woman or girl is when she has intercourse the more likely it is that there's more of the corona to wear away, and the more likely it is there will be some bleeding. It probably goes without saying that the one "should" I'd put in this is that if you do have any of the inaccurate or value-based ideas about bleeding with first intercourse I talked about here, I do think you should consider ditching them.
How can injury happen during sex? We get asked what you're asking a lot, and have a lot of women writing in worried that they didn't bleed, and also hear from men who don't trust the sexual history of women partners who didn't bleed. The most common reasons for intercourse being painful are also often 1 - 3 above, not 4. If you do or did have bleeding, you'll also want to chill with intercourse for a few days so that whatever that injury was has a chance to heal. We say at least because in her study, some of the women she asked about it couldn't remember. Because of all of those kinds of ideas and cultural precedents, bleeding was usually seen as something that better well happen, and because sometimes "proof" needed to be shown that a woman was, in fact, a virgin as she said she was. Other women cut themselves on purpose to create blood. If any man take a wife, and go in unto her, and hate her, and give occasions of speech against her, and bring up an evil name upon her, and say, I took this woman, and when I came to her, I found her not a maid: To understand why people think the way they do about this, it's helpful to consider history. In other words, for many women in history, proving to be a virgin through blood could literally save their lives. As you know now, that bleeding may possibly be due to a medical condition you need looked into and treated, or an injury from sex you need treatment for, or just an awareness of why it's happening so you can find out how to keep it from happening again. Not all people with vaginas bleed with first-time intercourse or other kinds of vaginal entry: Because not bleeding could result in things like divorce, a public gynecological examination, being disowned by family or community or even a stoning or other kind of public execution, what many women did was fake bleeding. The corona is usually very stretchy and flexible, so even someone who has one that's not yet eroded enough to be totally out of the way can have pleasurable sex without bleeding from that tissue when they are aroused and lubricated enough, be that lubrication from their own bodies or from a bottle. And to think how much you all worry about someone seeing a menstrual stain on your pants! The idea that "breaking in" or "deflowering" a woman was about male power and prowess, same deal. In that case, the corona often just slides to the side of the vaginal opening a lot like the inner labia stay to the side during intercourse. One study which was done, cited by my friend Hanne Blank in her book, Virgin: Historically, there have also been some issues of cultural expectations for men and women alike afoot around this, like the notion that a marriage wasn't really bonafide unless it had been consummated, so blood on the sheets proved a married couple had had sex. Consider that in our modern day, for as much as you hear adults talking about how young people having sex in their teens and twenties are, many women in history, and in some places still, had first intercourse and marriage at even younger ages than now. The same people also often think first-time intercourse usually or always will be -- or even should be -- painful. Maybe you will or did have bleeding, and maybe you won't or didn't. The same is true today. In either case, that doesn't tell us, all by itself, anything about you, your value as a person, the state of your virginity or your sexual experience. We know that some people with vaginas have bleeding and that others have none. We can always know at a birth who someone's mother is, since we can see an infant come out of her body. Because this tissue wears away over time, the younger a woman or girl is when she has intercourse the more likely it is that there's more of the corona to wear away, and the more likely it is there will be some bleeding.
Video about after bleeding first having sex time:
Does Having Sex For the First Time Hurt? - The Naked Truth
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